Playing it safe.

August 21, 2012 at 6:32 AM (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , )

I’ve noticed something interesting.  And in a way I’m kind of sad that I’ll have to go against it.

Because I know my family members raise these issues out of concern for my safety.

In the next few years, I’ll have the opportunity to move back into Cuyahoga County…

I love the neighborhood I live in now.  It’s well kept, quiet, ..pretty darn upscale.

(it’s very atypical for housing for people with disabilities to be in upscale neighborhoods…this is a unique situation.)

But…in the part of Lorain County I live in, there is very very little in the way of accessible transportation.

Which is the biggest reason for me to accept the move back into Cuyahoga County. (The second reason is that I’d be closer to family and friends)

It appears my family (both sides) have real concerns about this move.

The conversations often go something like this:

“You know you really ought to consider staying. This is such a great place.”

or “We think you should just stay here.” “This is wonderful.”

To which, I always answer, “Would *you* live without a car?”

They, of course, say no.

Well, since I’m unable to drive…Public transit is my “car.”

And frankly, I’d like it back.

I leave home rarely, due to the difficult nature of one of my impairments, but when I do leave, I’d like to have more options than an ambulette for medical transport only. (And who knows how long Medicaid is going to keep covering medical transport in the state of Ohio?)

And, yes, I’d have to rely pretty heavily on transit to emergency grocery shop, (my home health person can do the regular shopping), get to church.. get laundry quarters,things, that since the apartment complex is literally smash up behind a strip mall, myself and the power chair can handle nicely in good weather in my present place.

The family’s  perception of the neighborhood I’d be moving into is that it can be unsafe sometimes. I agree with that.  I wouldn’t be going out evenings or early mornings. I’ve lived in the exact same area of Cleveland before, when I was first married, and I think I know the drill.

I do appreciate any concern for my safety.  It’s welcome.  But I’m not going to play it safe, I’m going to shoot for some more independence.

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Boxed in

February 17, 2008 at 8:12 AM (Uncategorized) (, , )

It’s not black and white.

It’s not simple.

There are so many factors that keep me intermittently housebound.

One, I can’t do busses anymore, so my public transit is limited to the kind of things I can schedule.  I can’t just decide I want to eat at Racines, or stop at the 16th street Mall, or hit the Mayan for a movie.

And, if the impairment that affects my gut is acting up all is cancelled and I stay home.

And the subtler one that makes me angry, both at the housemate and at myself.

Of course, the roomate has their own life, time, goals, interests…

But subtly, they just won’t take me places they don’t have a reason to go to themselves.

We got together to split expenses, so they do ‘benefit’ from only having to pay for half the car, rent, gas, insurance, food, cable etc.

But, I figure it’s a subconsious benefit they give themselves, not to go anywhere they don’t want to….as payback for nearly all the cooking, much (though not all) of the cleaning, and the entirety of the laundry.

I can’t pay the roomate a wage, to be a paid PCA.

Thankfully for them, they aren’t on call as a chauffeur the minute I want to attend a church, or a reading, or a booksigning or a film.

And *they shouldn’t be*

But it still leaves me boxed in.

And yeah, it bugs me.

But there’s no good answer.

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