It’s an illusion.

May 2, 2014 at 11:04 AM (Uncategorized)

All this getting about. To discover all the corners of my cage.

You see the power wheelchair came today, so until I have to go back to bed from fatigue, or God forbid there’s some other problem, I will be up in the chair. Apparently there is a full Mass today which I will be attending… along with my regular therapy.

But all of it, except the Mass, is window dressing, Wizard of Oz fakery. Because There is still  the bed without sheets, a temporary inconvenience , the hideous heat. Or the cold. Or the personal tasks  uncomfortably delayed by chronic evening and weekend understaffing.

I keep reminding myself that they are cheerful here and well intentioned. And most importantly…

It is not the last facility or for all its private room luxury I was nearly burned in the shower, or the night one weekend where due to error either by the hospital doctors or the staff at the facility I was overmedicated with oxycontin to the point where I was completely non responsive taken by ambulance to the nearest hospital and given something called marcan to wake me up. Then followed 3 days where an ever-shrinking part of my consciousness was sure that I was going to be tortured as I had been that night in the emergency room. (because my head was full of oxy that night and I couldn’t discern the truth and the truth didn’t show back up in my brain completely for 3 days. ) I want as few patients as possible to go through that. So even though the last facilitiy was bigger cleaner had more stuff in a large therapy gym I cannot and will not go back there . Because my social workers became aware of this it was reported after I left the facility in order to avoid
indirect retribution.

So whenever inconveniences I have to undergo here and I do mean whatever inconveniences, the people work hard to do right even when there is understaffing. They show a good face to me, and my family is nearby.    So I will hold tight to those good things and suffer through the rest.


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