I was going to title this “Lexi’s Legacy,” but I realized that my readers might that she had died. When I could not handle her on my own, she found a new home and is quite happy in it…
So instead, I will talk about what she did.
I am a dog person. Now and forever onward, ever since that little girl was brought into my home with big dark eyes,
a wiggling backside and a happy feisty temper.
I used to be an anti-dog person. Scared to death of them…nervous, always had to be seated when they came around, could never get used to the smell, etc.
The first two months were hell. She chewed on everything but humans, and didn’t want to be anywhere near me. I was less than enthused about her being there and the feeling was mutual. She was never aggressive, but practiced avoidance big time….my former roomate was the Real Person, the one she’d bonded with. I wasn’t even a Second Tolerated Person. I was the Sick One Who Yelled A Lot and weirded her out.
Then, she discovered that she liked tuna. And that I was The Purveyor of the Tuna. (I really think she has some cat in her DNA.) She learned sitting and playing dead from me. (and begging and rolling over from the roomate…an even split).
She discovered my wheelchair made a great napping den, and headed underneath it for her daily 2:00-6:00 nap.
I was annoyingly foccussed elswhere, after all. The darn computer. It would become 8:00 pm Time To Eat….and she’d come and stand on her hind legs, put her forepaws on my knee…and wait patiently…or not so patiently while I got into trouble on the internet…
“It’s time to EAT!” “Whyaren’tyoupayingAttentionToMe!!!” “I’m righthererightnowandIwantmyFOOD, you stupid human..!”
I got better at feeding and playing with her for specified lengths of time, and she allowed, she liked me better then.
It was when the roommate was hospitalized with something severe, away for awhile, that Lexi and I finally bonded….she’d come and sleep nearby, and start licking me at the top of my head with the obviously laudable goal of licking my entire self…starting down the shoulders and arms etc…until I got better….and I would laugh and say “Lexi, honey, I really appreciate this, but licking ain’t gonna fix me…” Especially since a miniature schnauzer couldn’t possibly cover the entirety of the landscape. She would sit on my feet when I was sad, and wouldn’t let me leave my recliner, unless she went with me. She met my friends and I discovered she is a shameless flirt who loves men, all men,even the evil ex boyfriend, better than women.
For example, if a male friend had visited, and my former roommate came home from her workshift, instead of the usual multiple Leaps of Gladness at her arrival, Lexi’s reaction would go something like:
“Who are you? I don’t wanna see you…I don’t wanna talk to You…Where’s my New Boyfriend, huh? I want them! I don’t want a thing to do with you until I’ve seen the Man!”
Over time, I became the Second Person, the one to look to when the First Person was nowhere to be found. I was still the bad copbut I got more respect and affection…on the day I called graduation day, she was uncharacteristically close, snuggled into my tummy in bed, and wasn’t about to be dislodged for a good while…she knew something was up.
Since her Graduation Day last year (The day she went to her new home) I now have this urge to rescue dogs. I see the ones abandoned by cruelty or displaced by storms…they all seem to have that same hopeful look on their faces as they stare into the camera. I wish I could take one into my home, especially the ones that seem to come across my FB feed with the warning that they may be euthanized very soon if no home is found. I get profoundly sad sometimes.
However, I know getting Lexi to a new place was absolutely the right decision because I don’t have the resources to see to her proper veterinary care or the right technology or training skills to help her handle her business in conjunction with the house rules of my present home.
But I will never be automatically nervous around another dog…I’ll be open and glad to see them, quick to play with them and ask after their habits, communicate with them fluently and get what they’re saying back to me, even if they don’t make a sound.
That’s one of the many things that LexiTheSchnauzer did for me, and doggone it that’s a good thing.
First it was the ignorant professor who decided that fat people don’t posses the discipline to become Phd’s. WTF?
(That’s right up there with the Cleveland Clinic’s decision to deny desk jobs to applicants with a high BMI)
Then there’s Bill Maher. Evidently he’s not a comic or a television host anymore. Just an A***ole with a target audience and a market share who figures it’s just fine to call Trig Palin a ‘retard.’ I may disagree with Trig’s Mom’s politics, but not about dignity for Trig.
And in a more serious vein.
I only recently became aware of the story of Alex Spourdalakis, the teen with autism whose cargiver had been offered help, but turned it down…and then decided to plan her son’s murder.
When stories like this come up, with all the sympathy for the caregiver….it’s just as clear as a bell…the moment that PWD’s become difficult to care for or costly to care for….it is never outside the realm of possibility that some unbalanced person with authority over you will make you go away. That’s sickening and terrifying in any language.
What *is* it that makbes able people decide to dismiss, target or even destroy people different from them? It surely doesn’t make them any better…
Persons with disabilities (henceforth abbreviated PWD’s) get really dumb stuff said to them by the able all the time. But this one takes it.
An associate of mine was struggling with life responses that they themselves were suffering by (in other words their own choices), but also dealing with a bunch of stuff that wasn’t their fault. An able bodied spectator of their life’s drama said, and I quote:
“You know I really don’t understand why you don’t just shoot yourself in the head.”
That, of course, is the ugliest version of “I could never live like that.” or “I’m not good with sick people,” etc.
First shut your mouth unless your actual intent when you got up this morning was to devalue and terrify an associate of mine.
Second: And I’ll say this slowly so that any able bodied slowcoach who says these sorts of things can clean out their ears or take some hangover remedy and listen.
Yes, you could live like that. Yes…you could. Admitting “I’m scared of living like that,” now that’s more like it and we can begin a dialogue there. How many of our veterans are dealing with PTSD or TBI? Or How many car accidents cause radical alterations in the way those injured in them have to manage their lives?
A just as flip, unhelpful nasty answer to the “shoot yourself in the head,” remark, might be a slow smile and a “You first…:).” [In my days of newsgroup flamewarring I might have said just such a thing…] But a better answer is “Because I still have stuff to do.”
Yeah, it’ll get done by methods and ways that some able can’t begin to think about…but it’ll get done.
Thirdly, there are folks who at one time or another have real, searing suicidal ideation. Do you with that earnest statement (it wasn’t a joke, I was there) want to encourage their own vulnerability and fear about what they are experiencing? Don’t put a thumb on the scale unless you’re really fine with learning a particular friend checked out early. Because I know I’m not.
And the, “I’m not good with sick people,” thing is just a cowards way out, frankly. Let’s say you have a friend. And they are going through things that make you sad, or angry or frightened. You don’t have to get in there and ‘suffer’ with them 24/7 because they’d just as much rather hear about the news, or pop culture, or family stuff or gardening, in balance with being able to air what’s going on with them.
It’s difficult certainly but it beats leaving the party early.
with leftward politicians or presidents, so I say regarding the AP leaks: Holder has to go.
…and I say about the IRS…this is about the most shameful stupid move any taxing agency could make.
…and had that been all of it, I’d be able to still feel bad for the targeted t party groups, but now we know that key words like “progressive” were used to target leftward groups as well.
It’s small comfort to know the targeting was in fact, bipartisan. Dear current administration: Please stop with the incompetence or you will open the door to crazy all over again.
so I can call customer service at my cable company to make a payment, etc.
Because this smartphone I was forced into buying by charger death and replacement obsolesence is just hell.
I cannot handle phone trees any longer because my phone screen goes away after thirty seconds.