April 30, 2009 at 8:11 PM (Uncategorized)

I’m trying to breathe in and out slowly so as not to yell and go on a verbal tear in a friends defense. (and no this does not apply to any on facebook, so don’t fret)

Someone made themselves a friend of mine, on another site, who never was. They were not an enemy, they didn’t do anything bad to me, but they certainly did mess up an aquaintaince in college by being particularly clueless in their conduct towards this friend. This friend and I have had our differences, but I believe we have mended them best we can.

I defend my friends when I feel they were wronged.

It was twenty five years ago…so I’ll leave it be. But this person was *never* my friend…and they don’t need to say they are.



  1. bridgett said,

    Friend is such an elastic word in the digital context. Are my former students “friends”? Not really, but they sort of know me and we can talk and have fun, but they are not intimates. Coworkers and dance moms? They’re coworkers and dance moms. Though I’ve really lucked out with the people I work with and the people who parent Kid’s dance team, it remains to be seen if we’d socialize extensively if we weren’t thrown together in a common condition and a common place. They’re sort of like dorm friends or people you take a class with, where you are engaged in a common activity but the relationship is based more on proximity. Then there are old friends from high school that I haven’t seen in twenty years who I believe would be good friends if we still lived close, but mainly the relationship is one of nostalgia. There are people like Nick, whom I think about daily and whom I feel like I know through his writings, but whom I haven’t actually ever met. There’s my Tennessee peeps of varying intensities of relationship, including Betsy, who is more of a friend to me though we’ve never met than most of my flesh-and-blood daily contacts. There’s you, who I write every day and who still is a big part of my daily circle of thinking. There’s John, who is my day and night.

    I think the word “friend” is a little too capacious. Remember, that’s the knock on Americans when we travel in Europe — the Germans think we’re too soon friendly and the French think we are offensively quick with the tutoyer.

    • imfunny2 said,

      I’m glad to know that I’m in the ‘thinking.’ Not ashamed to admit that I need that knowledge at the moment…

      Now as to the content…

      Aquaintance. Contact. Classmate. Co Worker. (I’d like to see the current technology evolve so that on Facebook and other similar places the person requesting to connect has some choices other than friend….

      And conversely to the whining of the post, there are also several from my past that I’d like to connect with. My closest First Insurance Company coworkers, who at the very end of my tough times, knew the full deal and treated the chaos of it with respect.

      I wish my father’s people were more Internet savvy.

      I worry about some of the bloggers I check often when I haven’t heard from them in a while….

      It’s amazing how much you can invest in the work/communication of someone you’ve never seen.

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