April 23, 2009 at 10:37 PM (Uncategorized)

I won’t go into the grim details of the Preparation and Execution of the Creepiest Diagnostic Test Ever…

Except for this non gross out part.

I just found out yesterday (!) that both the predinsone I took for chemo in 1991 *and* the short courses I rarely need for asthma weakened my vein walls considerably… (would have been nice if the Oncology Superstars at the Cleveland Clinic had *clarified that bit for me* in 1991. But why should I be surprised….they missed emphasizing that the high doses of prednisone after six months might get into the spinal fluid, hit the blood brain barrier and provide me with a temporary *vacation from reality,* which happened in some week in October of 1991….but oh well. I can’t b!tch too much. They saved my life…)

Yes. Something they could have told me about chemo’s *permanent* effect on my circulatory system in 1991…I found out in 2009. From a conscientious phlebotomist.

And it’s not just because I’m big, because the phlebotomist told me she has a patient every two weeks that weighs in at 460 that she has no trouble drawing from.

Because my veins are now impossible to stick… they all blow out…Basic Nurse, Experienced Nurse and Anesthesiologist *could not get* an IV in. Eight attempts… Eight. (one of the nurses actually still got mad after I apologized in advance because I knew I was going to say “*uck!” loudly if they tried a particularly tough spot. I did, and she got peeved…)

“I don’t think you can ever apologize enough for that.”

What was I supposed to do? Go to the main board and write “I will never curse again 500 times with magic marker?”


So they did a new cool thing, which the Anesthesiologist of the Excellent Suggestion advised. Took me to ultrasound…they found out the least sensitive, best vein to draw from…and proceeded without incident. The team told me that from now on, for any future IV placement I should ask them to ultrasound the arm first. Simple.



  1. bridgett said,

    This was the non-gross and acceptable part? That sux.

    • imfunny2 said,

      Believe me. That was the non-gross acceptable part.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: