Saturday Fat Bashing

September 30, 2006 at 11:22 AM (Addiction, Fat) ()

…is going on over at Alas, and so I commented, but here is the corrected version of that comment. I am so completely *DONE* with the assumptions not-fat people make and can point and laugh at when a fat person comes into their sphere.

What makes me the most crazy, is since fat *is* the last acceptable point and laugh excuse, is no *matter* the reasons behind it that the strangers don’t know, *every* fat person faces the same type of discrimmination, disrespect,humiliation and shame. Once one is fat, strangers feel the need to police what we eat, what we wear, they feel they have every right to lecture us about it.
I’m a “dual eligible.” A person with disabilities that *predated* my obesity and still exist, *separate and apart from that,* that make excersize nearly impossible. (spastic pariplegia, asthma, etc) I do what I can. It isn’t enough.

I’ve been able to give up high fat foods easily…in Overeaters Anonymous parlance I have *control* over fatty foods. I can take them or leave them. so I am not “powerless” over *all* foods.

It’s my perception and belief (should apply to myself alone) that I’m a sugar addict. Not an overall food addict. Just sugar. Sugar is only one or two molecules away from the chemical composition of alchohol, and my family has a predisposition for alchoholism…so my own experience tells me that this is why a degreed, smart professional person feels helpless about ever being able to stop eating too much sugar.

I’m better at it than say five years ago, but I cannot seem to completely stop eating the low value high sugar stuff.
So what if it is an addiction for me? Alchoholics are told to simply stop drinking and given strategies to cope. Drug addicts to stop ingesting the drug.

But if one is addicted to a food that is bad for them? We *still have to go to the grocery*

It’s as if an alchoholic was told: You still *must* go to the bar every day…but only drink water while everyone around you is buying up the booze. Would any alchoholism counselor *reccommend* such nonsense? Of course not! But, for the subset of heavy people who percieve an addiction in themselves, this is precisely what society demands that we do!

And if we cannot walk into a place full of the addictive things, and walk out with chicken, turkey, soy milk and salads and a small amount of fruit…

Then, we’re “disgusting.” We have no “will power!” I wish everyone who points and laughs at fat persons would read about Health at Any Size, and about a medical root to a possible sugar/carb addiction…insulin resistance!

I’m over 300 and 5′3…the disability has made me two inches shorter than my DNA says I ought to be, so a small percentage of my problem is directly tied to things out of my control.

In order to survive cancer I had to take 50 mg of prednisone a day for nine straight months, that influenced me to eat more than I had before. I’m presently on a medication that has the single side effect of weight gain.

When food addiction recovery programs exist in such a way that processed sugar isn’t hidden in almost everything, and that I can make a choice not to shop…in other words *remove myself* from the situation entirely…then I may be able to work towards getting smaller.

Until then I won’t put up with anybody’s disgust or disrespect…To the strangers on the street “You don’t know how the **** I got here or have any idea of the difficulty of changing!” Respecting me as a person isn’t all that difficult, and frankly I demand it. That’s right. Demand it.

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Sidelined

September 30, 2006 at 8:07 AM (Uncategorized) (, )

Well, I had another trip scheduled into the mountains today….

And, symptoms cropped up to tell me it was best to stay in….

What I’m thinking about today is…

The various ways that associates, with impairments and without, make assumptions or judgements about those that “don’t get out much.”

We’re uppity and we think we’re “too good for [whomever]”

We’re lazy.

We let fear dictate our choices (Well, yes, on that last….I’d rather not have hour long attacks in the bathroom and I’ve gotten good at recognizing the cues that make it quite likely…) But this isn’t an irrational fear of socializing….*that* kind of fear should not keep one inside, ever…

1. We don’t make committments and break them for fun, or to dissapoint and frustrate our family or friends. We’d rather be doing. Absolutely. We aren’t staying in because of laziness, if it is symptoms that get in the way.

And in my particulars, the symptoms are not anything for which I claim any amount of positive impact on my life. Irritable bowel syndrome is nothing I can claim to be adapted to/resigned to/or get any good out of. It is the single piece of my multiple impairment puzzle that has the most negative affect on my life, ahead of all the rest and not recognized as a “disability” in and of itself.

2. I still think it’s important to make plans, even if an average of about 50% of them fall through…because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be out and about doing anything, instead of half as much as you’d like to…

Related to “going out.” I’ve never understood the sense of the general disdain or fear of going to films or plays alone…Once widowed, I decided that it was silly to miss a film or on rarer occasions a play that I wanted to see, simply because I would have to go alone…In the days before irritable bowel syndrome became such a constant, if I wanted to see a film or play and had the time or money…I went…It is absolutely better to go alone than not to go at all.
And, although I get to many many fewer films first run, I still go to some of them alone, for the same reason. (in the age of On Demand, or through the mail DVD rental, I’m just six months or so behind anything I didn’t get to)

I’ve also gone to “couple heavy” events, because friends were going…I won’t deny that those are difficult, but my experience is, again, it’s better to go than not, if you’ve got friends there who will take time to reach out and include you.

So, if we’re willing to be out and about, *even* in ways and to events that the able would not choose to attend alone, then, the biggest barrier can still be access.

Comedy clubs are still notoriously inaccessible, as a class…thank goodness Josh Blue is a crip jock as well as a comic, or he might have trouble getting into the building in which he has a show…

Performance venues have been sued, in what I’ll call the worst post ADA blunder…the assumption that the access is there without checking for the seating area or adaptive devices that actually make acess possible–to promise and then not deliver, and *blame* the customer for the difficult or outright bad experience.

Or the de facto exclusion from a concert when everyone in front of you stands and dances without leaving an open line of sight….We can ‘access’ the sound, but not the sights.

Going out should always be fun, or partially fun…but here’s hoping that however often people with impairments go out, it’s another method of chipping away at older, passe perceptions, that we belong inside…sometimes reaching the level of an act of defiance. Doesn’t have to be that laden with seriousness…but it can do nothing but good…the more we’re out, the less motivation or chance for being “shut-in” not by our impairments, but by attitude, or inaccessibility of a physical or social nature.

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